In working with women over the years I have been privy to all the little jabs and negative self-talk that clients tell themselves, and I have to say that I'm not happy about it for several reasons. First, because we as women deserve to feel great about ourselves each and every day! And second, because that negative self talk turns into self-sabotage that prevents us from making the changes we'd really like to make to improve both our image and our outlook.
It's the little things that we tell ourselves each and every day that add up to big differences in our lives. Putting ourselves and our lives 'on hold' indefinitely because we think we need to lose 10 pounds (or 50), we're too busy, or we don't think we can afford it begins to send the message that we're not worthy, that we don't deserve to change, that we aren't good enough...our inner gremlins come out and simply take over, leaving us to feel, well, pretty bad about our selves and putting us that much further from living the life of our dreams.
What can you do about this? Well, for starters, you can simply make the decision that you're going to take action right now and make a difference for you! Saying that you can't change the way your dress, your hairstyle or anything about your appearance until you lose 25 pounds is equivalent of saying "I'm too fat and I don't deserve to look good", isn't it? That's enough to depress you right into polishing off another box of cookies, and just perpetuates this vicious cycle.
When you change your perspective and begin to do little things for yourself, treating yourself to a gorgeous new shade of lipstick, trying a new haircut that shows off your lovely face or buying a new dress that makes you feel sexy in the body you have right now, you say YES to you! You begin to see the beauty you already possess, you feel great and have a positive attitude that brings a new spark to your life. How cool is that?
If you find yourself still stuck in the same old patterns, feeling cranky and undeserving, here are a few tips you can try to help you say YES to YOU!
1/ Write a love note to yourself. Place it on your mirror so you see it first thing in the morning! Simply phrases such as "You are Gorgeous!", "You ARE all that!" or "I love you!" are enough to begin to shift your perspective.
2/ Do something just because. Sign up for a class you've always wanted to take. Take a mental health day and go have a makeover. Buy a scarf because you LOVE it! Doing something to fulfill an inner desire and see how happy it makes you!
3/ Do something for someone else. Surprise a friend with an unsolicited compliment, treat your significant other to a romantic dinner in, pay it forward. Giving of yourself helps you to feel expansive in a loving way and feel great about yourself.
4/ Dress yourself for YOU! Forget about what you always wear, or what you think you SHOULD wear, wear what feels great to you! If that means stepping out and trying something totally new, go for it! Just make sure you love it and you're wearing it for all the right reasons.
5/ Take care of you. When you take time out for a much needed massage, get a mani/pedi or have a facial, you allow yourself to be taken care of and it feels great. It will help you rejuvenate and have more to give to those around you!
So don't wait. Embrace the amazing woman you are right now and say YES to yourself - no matter what your weight, your size or your outlook, life's too short not to experience the little things that make it special - every day!